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Post Info TOPIC: Judge Cooley still MIA
Thomas Cooley's Risk Manager

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Judge Cooley still MIA
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My fellow FS readers:


Judge Cooley remains missing at this hour.  The only news I have to report is a cryptic e-mail messge (no name) indicating he was safe.  It could've been from him, or from someone else.  Of course, there's the possibility I don't want to face --- that it was hoax.


My associate and I have been aiding law enforcement officials in the search.  We have also been doing the job Judge Cooley pays us to do, because we think that's what he would want.


As part of that, we were fully prepared to attend the first PUC meeting at USM this morning in the Union.  We were on our way, but were tipped off about the participation of Ms. Naylor.  When we heard what she had in store, we did a 180.  Boy did we dodge a bullet, or should I say a page full of rectangles of varying shapes and sizes.  My associate completely lost interest when we found out they weren't serving popcorn with the 2 management videos.


We went to an early lunch at Crescent City.  We both ordered steaks and sent them back several times (just for grins).  We complained about everything, and eventually got a free dessert with our meal (which we also complained about).  When Clint Taylor came out and informed us that we were complaining too much, my associate asked him where the complaint meter/sensor was located. 


We spent the afternoon going over some financial reports we got from Gregg Lassen's office last week.  USM is about to have one big cash-flow crisis on her hands, believe me.  My associate hasn't seen books like this since a series of RICO hearings he served as counsel on.  I suspect this impending problem is behind the large push for grant money.  Keep your fingers crossed on payroll this fall (from what we've seen, you're going to need it, especially if enrollment is headed where my associate thinks it is).


Finally, I've sent for my brother-in-law, the prof who gave Angeline the D+ at TCLS.  He's known Judge Cooley for most of his life, and can probably lend a helping hand in our search.


Thanks for your prayers.  Judge Cooley will be fine.  I feel it.


Rick Manager to JTC 



__________________
present professor

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quote:
Originally posted by: Thomas Cooley's Risk Manager
"My fellow FS readers: Judge Cooley remains missing at this hour.   . . .Judge Cooley will be fine.  I feel it. Rick Manager to JTC  "

Dear RM:


We can only hope for the Judge's safe return -- hope your optimism is justified.


On the other hand, didn't I hear from a mutual friend that the Judge tends to heed the irresistable draw of the Quarter when he is within 100 miles of NOLA? I've heard some wild stories  . . . maybe you out to call Galitoires and put out an APB down on Bourbon . . . 


At any rate, we await further developments with bated breath.



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Fire Shelby


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Ok, I understand that this is all fiction, but I can't wait for the next episode of "Thomas Cooley visits Hattiesburg."



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Fire Shelby


Status: Offline
Posts: 1140
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quote:
Originally posted by: present professor
" Dear RM: We can only hope for the Judge's safe return -- hope your optimism is justified. On the other hand, didn't I hear from a mutual friend that the Judge tends to heed the irresistable draw of the Quarter when he is within 100 miles of NOLA? I've heard some wild stories  . . . maybe you out to call Galitoires and put out an APB down on Bourbon . . .  At any rate, we await further developments with bated breath. "
Could he be at the Gulf Coast casinos?  I think he would be right at home at the Isle.  Might wanna check those out, too.

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LVN

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quote:
Originally posted by:
"Could he be at the Gulf Coast casinos?  I think he would be right at home at the Isle.  Might wanna check those out, too."
IF he is, maybe he can find out where's all that great EDUCATION money we were supposed to get from there!

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ThomasCooleyJr

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Hey dad:

I heard mommie say she heard a rumor that Judge Cooley was holed up in a sailboat down in Gulfport, bound for Cuba. She said that was better than being dropped from an airplane at 1000 feet over the Gulf for malfeascence in not teaching enough dirty tricks to the law school graduates.

But she didn't believe that at all.

She said she believe Judge Cooley was being held hostage on the former Van Hook Golf course by some dixie mafia guys. There was a bulldozer parked nearby she thought, next to a small mobile home contractor headquarters, where demolition of will begin shortly to usher in a new technological age for south Mississippi.

But, mommie's next door neighbor said she is sure that poor Thomas was abducted by aliens in Biloxi.

__________________
Invictus

Date:
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quote:
Originally posted by:
"Ok, I understand that this is all fiction, but I can't wait for the next episode of "Thomas Cooley visits Hattiesburg.""


This is fiction?

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