Hello FS Friends:

This is my first time addressing you all.  I am Judge Cooley's Risk Manager's associate.  I am 31 years old, about 6'2", 215lbs, and cut.  I have university degrees in ancient languages and physics, and I have a special investigations training certificate from the FBI.  I am single, blue eyes, etc.  Some of you may have seen me around campus this past 2 weeks, or around the Hog with either Lisa or C.E. or both.

I am glad to be able to report to you all here today.  Judge Cooley and my immediate boss are out on the lake at Canebrake again.  We went out there and bought 2 lots and 3 homes, and in the process ran into Steve McNair.  They are all out skiing and fishing again.

I wanted to get away and report to you all the following plan I have devised.  I have spent the past 4 weeks setting up a dummy corporation in the "high tech" field, with "operations" worldwide in "process technology."  These seem like all of SFT's faves.  We have acquired, using money from the TCLS Foundation, 3 process patents.  Here's the deal.  We are describing ourselves in serious need of a higher ed instituion with research credentials and aspirations to further gain market share and reap larger rewards off of our patents, not to mention develop new patents. 

I think your president and VP of Research are about to take the bait.  I am hoping that "representatives" from this corporation are soon to be invited for one of those typical press conferences in the dome conference room.  If this happens, we're just getting started.  The dummy corporation will then become involved in some serious industrial espionage, not to mention embezzlement by its CEO and President, who is going to get tangled up with Kelli Booth and Mark Dvorak through stock-swaps.  We're going to bring the whole cabal down, and the dummy corporation will then recede into the Grand Cayman night, as they say.

Keep your eyes and ears tuned.  Till further notice,

The Associate